Not for Want of Trying

If the Universe had meant for me to find a kindred
It would have happened years ago
When I was soft, untried, sharp with desire
For knowledge but burning far from the path.

For once taken,
The path to knowledge guides the soul
Out into abyss
Across continent and under ocean.

The soul is changed,
The skin is broken.

I cannot curse the stars
For my loneliness;
They are my companions.

We are each solitary sentinels,
Solemn witnesses to the great Night.

They say love can bend the bright
Light of day into sweeter shades
Of hidden intimacy,
But wisdom has shown me the fancy
Inherent in romantic whimsy.

The lines upon my heart
Cannot be unwritten -
My softest parts
Have been beaten into vellum.

I have stood too long with my face to the wind.

The pen of the world scribbles as it wills,
And this is my company, caress,
And fulfillment.